"A Place in this World" by Taylor Swift

"i don't know what I want, so don't ask me cause i'm still trying to figure it out don't know what's down this road, i'm just walking trying to see through the rain coming down even though i'm not the only one who feels the way i do..

i'm alone, On my own, and that's all i know i'll be strong, i'll be wrong, oh but life goes on i'm just a girl, trying to find a place in this world

got the radio on, my old blue jeans and i'm wearing my heart on my sleeve feeling lucky toDay, got the sunshine could you tell me what more do i need and tomorrow's just a mystery, oh yeah but that's ok

i'm alone, On my own, and that's all i know i'll be strong, i'll be wrong, oh but life goes on i'm just a girl, trying to find a place in this world

maybe i'm just a girl on a mission but i'm ready To fly...

i'm alone, On my own, and that's all i know i'll be strong, i'll be wrong, oh but life goes on i'm just a girl trying to find a place in this world"

You are probably wondering why I put the lyrics to a Taylor Swift song on my blog, well I am a big fan of her's, even though I have only been her fan since probably February of this year. This song pretty much says it all about how I have been feeling lately. I know there are probably many people who are trying to find a place in the world and well that is me. I am 36 years old, almost 37 and I have no idea what I am suppose to do in life. I love being a wife, mother, sister, friend, daughter and granddaughter, but I sometimes feel like there is nothing else for me in the world, until yesterday, when I got a new calling in my ward and I know I am going to love this calling. I am the new Ward Librarian and they put me right to work yesterday and let me tell you, it was the greatest calling they could ever give me and let me tell you why. It is not that stressful and I needed a job like this right now, cause I haven't been feeling that great about anything lately and I always seem to screw everything up. I know most of the people in the ward, but I only see them on Sunday and not outside of Church, so hopefully with people having to come into the library, I can make more friends this way and I am looking forward to doing this. I have always had a hard time making friends and it has been like this my whole life and so I am so grateful for friends in my life right now and I hope to make more friends with this new calling. I always had to give some names to the Bishop of Assistant Librarians and I did that on my first day yesterday. I thought about these names that I chose through the rest of Sacrament meeting and being in the library and so I will see what happens. When the Bishopric told me about my calling, yes all 3 of them were in the room with me, I let out a sign of relief. Now, all callings in the ward are important and I have never turned down a calling before and so I was afraid of what calling I would get. I am just glad its not in the nursery, cause I probably would of turned that down and the people that read my blog and know me would understand why I would turn that calling down right now in my life.

I am glad that I have a calling now, cause I really need something that I know I can do well and not screw up. I am also glad there is a lot of things to read in there, cause there are times when no one needs any help with anything and being in there by myself did get lonely, but hopefully I will have an assistant soon, so then I won't be lonely and I can get to know them better too. I am also sorry for not writing in my blog, for almost 3 weeks. Sometimes I don't know what to write about, I am not that creative and I am a pretty boring person. I also don't have many people that read my blog anyway, so sometimes I wonder what the point is at writing in a blog, but I should just do this blog for me and not worry so much about how many people read my blog and make comments on it.

Ethan's Texas Trip

My oldest son went to Amarillo Texas last week and he has never been there before. I dropped Ethan off in Las Vegas Wednesday June 17 to meet my dad, who drove from Ramona CA and I said goodbye to him and they were on there way. They drove all the way to Albuquerque New Mexico to eat dinner and spend the night. Then they drove the rest of the way to Amarillo, which was only about 4 more hours or so. In case some of you who are wondering, why did he go to Amarillo TX, my sister Gayle and her husband and there 4kids live there. Ethan pretty much got straight to work, when he got there. My parents are building a house and shop there, right next door and so he was put to work to help out and yes my dad paid him. Thankgoodness, we opened a savings account for him before he left and now he has more money in there. I don't have any pictures of him in Texas, sorry, maybe my sister does. Will left for Vegas around 3:30 pm yesterday, so he left church early, so we had to take both cars to church, which was fine. Will and Ethan didn't get home, until 11:30 pm last night and so it was along day for them, but they managed. Ethan had lots of fun there and he hopes to go again sometime. I haven't been to Texas for a very long time, I lived there at the end of August 1973-June 1976, but we lived near Dallas and I don't remember that much about it. It is nice to have him home. He also started swimming lessons today.

Not Much

I haven't blogged in awhile, because I don't have to much to blog about. The kids got out of school on May 22 and its nice to have them home, but sometimes I wish I knew what to have them do around here. Then on Saturday May 23, we left for my sisters in Spanish Fork and it was nice to get away, even though it was only for a couple of days. Ethan had a blast playing with his cousins and Zach and Connor had fun playing with different toys and being in a different house for 2 days. We also went to Golden Corral for dinner on Saturday and I have never been there before and we all enjoyed it there, well 3 of us did. Connor only wanted milk and cookies and Zach tried the pizza there, but didn't like it, so he had milk and icecream for dinner. So, the next time we want to go there, we will get a babysitter for Zach and Connor. I also got to go to my favorite store, "The Quilted Bear" by myself, my boys don't really like that store, which is fine, cause I go up and down the isles and I look at everything. I got a few things. We came home Monday night and it was a fun weekend.

Here are some of the things we will be doing this Summer:

Summer School- Zach and Connor
Swimming Lessons - Ethan (Connor will do it next year, he isn't totally potty trained yet)
Volunteering for the Utah Summer Games-Malinda
Running and more running just for the fun of it-Will
Soccer-Ethan (this will be Ethan's 6th year doing it)
Diabetes Camp-Ethan (he is doing it the week before school starts in August)
Education Week at BYU Idaho-Malinda (that is still a maybe, anyone want to come with me)

Just before I forget, we changed around some furniture in the front room and the master bedroom and both rooms look so much better. When my dad was here on Friday and Saturday, he put a cable jack on the other wall in the front room and to do that he had to go in the attic and put the wire down that way and now the room looks so much better than it has ever looked before. As far as the master bedroom is concerned Will just flipped the room, so the bed is on the wall where the dressers used to be and the dressers are on the wall where the bed used to be. It is great how it looks now.